


Hobson's Choice

by Tarlan



Category: Haven (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Het Relationship, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-19 21:14:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7377676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Six months after the events in Haven, Nathan has come to terms with how he truly felt about Audrey. Still wanting to save her, he embarks upon a journey that brings him back face-to-face with William, and makes a choice that will affect both his and William's lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hobson's Choice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [roseveare](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseveare/gifts).



> Written for **Not Primetime 2016**
> 
> [roseveare](http://archiveofourown.org/users/roseveare/pseuds/roseveare) asked for 'Nathan': _I'm happy with so many things with this character I tend to just pick him and leave the option open. I'm good for stuff set post-finale, though I don't have so much interest in Paige. I'm good with most of the things._
> 
> I'm really hope this story isn't too sappy! Main character death listed in end notes for those who desperately need to know before reading.

"Croatoan will kill everyone in Haven. You shouldn't go back," William warned softly.

Nathan wasn't sure exactly what William was offering but he knew what he had to do. The long walk through the void with William had shown him what Croatoan was capable of doing not just to Haven but to his entire world, and without this control crystal Audrey had no chance of stopping Croatoan and saving all those lives. She was waiting for him on the other side of the thinny, depending on him, and he refused to let her down. When he stumbled through he fell into her arms, feeling the weight of the void fall away. His breathing became easier, and he could feel his strength returning and his head clearing. It took a moment to realize Hailie Colton was missing but the look on Duke's face told him all he needed to know. If Duke had opened the thinny using Audrey's ring then he must have used Hailie's curse.

Yet another life lost to the Troubles.

Despite everything they tried, eventually he had to stand aside and let Audrey leave with Croatoan, the man who considered himself her father even though Mara was dead. Nathan understood the necessity. He knew this time he had to let her go, that part of the reason why he loved her was because she was willing to give up everything for the people of Haven. Even without her saying the words, he knew she would not be coming back as Audrey or any other personality. This time she would be gone forever, and he couldn't promise her he would find someone else to make him happy. He couldn't promise to move on without her, not when she had become his life since the first time they touched, making him feel more than just physically. She had made him feel alive.

As he stepped outside the armory and looked back he felt a sensation of pressure that eased when a black globule of aether floated from his body. His trouble was leaving him, leaving the Hansen line forever. He knew the same thing was happening to other troubled people all over the world, and not just those in Haven. The aether would be returning to the void, drawn away from this world by Croatoan and Audrey. Before him the armory began to glow just as the barn had done before collapsing in upon itself. The light intensified, so bright it dazzled him, forcing him to look away, and when he looked back the armory was gone and Audrey with it.

In the month that followed he took back his old position as Chief of Police after Dwight stood down, taking early retirement so he could spend time with his daughter. Apparently, the ghost of Duke Crocker had told Dwight to believe with all his heart that she was real when the Troubles disappeared forever, and for once he had listened to Duke.When everything else disappeared, she had remained behind in Haven, alive and whole. Eventually Gloria confirmed the Troubles were gone for good this time. The DNA marker in the genes of the troubled was missing so could no longer be passed down from one generation to the next. After hundreds of years and countless versions of Mara, it was finally over.

That first month went by swiftly, dealing with people coming to terms with a future without the Troubles. The males of the Glendower family returned from the sea and others came back to the town now it was no longer hidden and could be found on a map. Whole families celebrated a new future while still grieving for those lost over the years, and Nathan had started to come to terms with being able to physically feel once more. These days he was acutely aware of the aches and pains from too many accidents during those years while he was unable to feel any sensations, but physical pain was nothing compared to the anguish in his heart from losing Audrey.

He dreamed of her often.

Last night's dream had mirrored their first meeting, except it was another personality calling herself Paige who stepped out of the car. In this dream she had James with her, his baby son conceived with Sarah Vernon, smiling happily from his child seat in the back of Paige's car. It had felt so real, right down to the pain in his fingers from the car door slamming on them, and his heart fractured a little more when he awoke and realized the ache was from sleeping awkwardly with his hand trapped under his body.

A beautiful dream, but a dream nonetheless, and the euphoria melted into bittersweet memories of Audrey and the life she had sacrificed for this world.

Six months later the pain of losing Audrey had settled into a manageable, dull ache, and yet he couldn't let go of the thought of Audrey imprisoned by the love she had felt for all the people Mara and William had troubled. He recalled William saying he spent five hundred years trying to peel away the layers of personalities and bring Mara back. For all his faults, Nathan could respect him for that at least even if William's love for Mara had not been reciprocated. In comparison his own life span was but a fraction of that time so it didn't seem fair. Audrey wasn't Mara. She didn't deserve to spend the rest of her far longer life span being punished for Croatoan's black deeds, or for Mara's.

As he sat on Haven Lookout, with the small town nestled on the shoreline far below, he played with the ring he kept on a chain around his neck. Audrey's ring. She had placed it into his safekeeping when he returned from the void with the control crystal. According to Charlotte the ring was one of three created to open thinnies back to her world. This one had belonged to Mara and had come to Audrey through Sarah Vernon. Dwight had Charlotte's ring, and Nathan had found the third ring among Garland's possessions. Charlotte told him it had once belonged to her husband but that ring was gone now. He had given it to William in the void, telling him to use it to open a thinny and go home.

He stood up, holding the ring aloft and letting it catch the last of the fading sunlight, staring at the diamond pattern engraved upon it as he wondered if the design had any symbolic meaning. The ring in his hand was useless now as Charlotte had locked down all the thinnies in this world, and even if the Troubles had remained, Hailie had been the last of the Colton line so there was no one left who could open even a temporary thinny. It hadn't stopped him from coming up here several times each week simply to try, and though he didn't really believe in a lot of the hocus pocus, the town psychic had hurried up to him today telling him something about astral planes in alignment. He figured it was nonsense but as he had nothing to lose here he was, standing on Haven Lookout as the sun set and these planets or astral whatever aligned, silently hoping for a miracle.

He squeezed his eyes closed and concentrated on the ring in his hand - and felt something. A pressure inside his head as if his body was channeling the last rays of the dying day. He could feel a low buzz like a musical saw throbbing through his bones and opened his eyes slowly to find a rip in the fabric of this universe right in front of him. A thinny leading into darkness. For a moment he froze, staring into the tear between universes. Charlotte had said the rings were special, creating a thinny that would lead back to her home world; to the only people who had the technology to save Audrey from a life sentence she didn't deserve. He could see the thinny was already stating to fail, sputtering and fizzing in and out so he made his decision, and jumped through.

It closed behind him instantly, and after a few moments he realized it wasn't pitch black. Above him he could not see any stars but he knew he was not inside a cave. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness he began to make out the shapes of bare trees with broken branches stretching up like gnarled fingers towards the starless sky. Beneath his feet he felt the crispness of dead leaves as the sky began to lighten, dawning a new day in contrast to the one ending in Haven, and he felt dismay as he recognized the ravaged landscape of the void. Yet as the sun rose he saw it was no longer completely desolated. He could see the verdant green of new growth, like a deciduous wood springing back to life after a long, hard winter. Perhaps that was what was happening here in the void now Croatoan was gone.

Holding the ring in his hand he concentrated on it once more, hoping to open another thinny that might take him on to Mara and William's world, or back to Haven, but nothing happened. Looking around in concern, Nathan wondered if he might have a better chance of opening the thinny in the same weak spot inside the cave. It was a long shot but he realized it was all he had.

As the sun rose higher in its curve across the sky he recalled William's words. 'Humans don't do well in the void'.

Last time he had started to feel the effects within the first hour and after another hour he had been desperate enough to hand William the raw aether, willing to be further Troubled if it meant he could reach the thinny and return to Haven. William was long gone by now, leaving him alone in the void, and if he couldn't find a way to open the thinny on his own then he was dead. By now he'd been walking and stumbling for well over an hour before finally recognizing a small outcrop of rocks. He tried to pick up the pace, forcing himself onwards against the labored pain in his chest and tired muscles, pausing momentarily when he spotted the remnants of the barn. At least its presence confirmed he was heading in the right direction. Nathan remembered how he had run headlong through the woods chased by William, his shortness of breath and blurring eyesight hindering his attempt to keep far enough ahead of William to get back through the thinny and close it before William reached it. Despite his longer stride he had been weakened by the effects of the void, proving just too slow, and the ensuing fight with William had not gone well. Nathan still recalled the weight of William's body pressing down on him, hands choking him, too weak to fight back as the void took its toll on his human body.

He couldn't find the energy he needed to make that run now, barely able to concentrate on placing one foot in front of the other as he stumbled towards the cave's entrance. Between one step and the next his arms flailed as the ground seemed to rush up to meet him, the carpet of brown, crisp leaves breaking his fall. Nathan tried to push up but his strength had left him. The world seemed to darken at the edges, creeping across his vision until all light was extinguished, and he fell into unconsciousness.

****

He noticed the warmth against one side of his body first, then the softness beneath him, finally forcing open his eyes to stare around the interior of a small wooden lean-to. The heat came from a camp fire and he stiffened at movement to one side.

"Well, well. You finally decided to rejoin the land of the living... Nate. Of course, when I found you I did consider just leaving you there to die but..." The man shrugged.

"William," Nathan murmured. "I don't...? Why?"

"Why didn't I leave you to die?" He smiled broadly, shaking his head quickly and throwing his arms wide. "Maybe because it's so much fun tormenting you, and I can't do that if you're dead."

"No... Why are you still here?" Nathan couldn't hold back the taunt even though William must have saved his life. "Or did they send you back again?"

The tic in his jaw proved Nathan had scored a direct hit.

"I never left," he stated. "What? You thought I'd run back there with my tail between my legs to beg their forgiveness?" His eyes were hard, his mouth a tight line, but then his expression softened. "I... appreciated the gesture though."

Nathan knew he was referring to Croatoan's ring. He watched as William crouched down a few feet from the soft mattress that he must have conjured up using the aether, and wondered why William hadn't created a more grandiose shelter the same way, perhaps a log cabin... or a mansion. The flicker of his eyes around him must have given away his thoughts.

"Yeah, it's not much to look at but I was kind of preoccupied over the last five hundred years with staying alive. Using the aether while Croatoan was around was not such a good idea. It drew him to me like a magnet."

It was a reminder William had been exiled to the same place as Croatoan, and probably spent most of those centuries hiding out from the rage-driven monster, never staying in one place too long. Though it was also likely Croatoan knew what William had meant to his beloved daughter, Mara, and had let him live. Perhaps he'd been biding his time, waiting for William to find a way out of the void to reach Mara, and then using that to his advantage. It certainly made more sense than William managing to keep one step ahead of that monster for five hundred years. Croatoan had moved like aether in vapor form so those deep pit traps would have given William no particular protection. Nathan suspected the pit he had fallen into that first time in the void had been set for some kind of wild boar, for food. He'd seen the tell-tale sign of small animals so why not some slightly larger forest-roaming ones too? It reminded him of William's glee at finding him in his pit trap. 

'Only thing more satisfying is if I'd been able to kick you into that hole myself', William had stated at the time, and under the circumstances Nathan could understand why. He had been the one to give William that final shove back into the void through the thinny opened inside the lighthouse.

There was no love lost between them, just the slimmest bond from having both loved a version of the same woman - Audrey and Mara - and that begged the question of why William had saved him this time? He watched as William stood back up and moved about almost aimlessly, and it occurred to him then that with Mara dead and Croatoan gone from the void, William would have lost everything that had kept him motivated over these five centuries; everything that had given his life purpose. He had nothing left now, having already admitted that he couldn't, or rather he wouldn't go back to his people, unwilling to ask for their forgiveness.

"Why are you here?" William asked after a lengthy silence, looking up from where he was stirring a pot bubbling above the fire.

The small breeze lifted the scent into the air towards him, reminding Nathan he hadn't eaten for a while, and his stomach rumbled embarrassingly, gaining him a crooked smile from William. He watched as William conjured up two bowls and filled both, bringing them over and waiting for Nathan to struggle weakly into a more upright position before handing one over. His hands shook from the weight of the filled bowl but Nathan managed to bring it to his mouth and take a sip of the thin, meat and vegetable broth. It tasted like rabbit, though just a little stronger in flavor, and he spotted the pile of fur to one side of the camp, wondering what sort of creature William had snared. He felt surprisingly better after a few mouthfuls.

"It's good," he stated, gaining a wry smile in response.

"I prefer pizza," William shrugged, lifting one shoulder only. "So... why _are_ you here?"

Deciding to be both blunt and honest, Nathan told him everything that happened after he returned to Haven, of how he had to let Audrey power the new 'barn' that would hold Croatoan - her father.

"Audrey isn't Mara. She doesn't deserve to be punished for what Mara... For what _you_ and Mara did."

"If you think I'm going to offer to take her place then think again, Nate," he sneered back.

"No. You told me your people were far more advanced than us... humans. They must be able to come up with some other means of imprisoning Croatoan without Audrey sacrificing the rest of her life."

"So you and Audrey could live happily ever after," he mocked.

Nathan faltered because these past six months without Audrey had revealed a different truth about himself. Yes, he had loved Audrey with all his heart and he would always love her, but the intensity of that love had been created from touch starvation. Until William threw that punch back in Haven, Audrey was the only person he had felt for so many years and he had latched onto her, wanting to keep on feeling, desperate for her touch. Six months without his trouble had given him back control of his body, allowing him to feel the sea breeze on his face and the cool rain on his skin. He felt every brush of hand, or cloth. He could feel the grip of the gun in his hand, the pressure against his trigger finger, having to learn how to shoot all over again. He no longer felt touch starved and the desperation of that need to feel his own body, to feel anothers soft skin had faded, and along with it the intensity of passion he had felt for Audrey. It didn't change anything though. He still loved her and he would still try anything to save her from her current fate.

William refused to look at him, keeping his face in profile as Nathan tried to explain the changed nature of his feelings for Audrey.

"You loved Mara once, and Audrey is all that was good in her. Help me save her," he asked and only the slightest tip of William's head proved he was listening at all but he didn't answer. Instead he got up and walked away, disappearing into the darkness of the surrounding woods, leaving Nathan all alone.

William returned several hours later, hands buried deep in his pockets and shoulders hunched. He didn't look at Nathan as he sank down beside the dying fire and added some kindling, seemingly mesmerized by the sparks and snaps of the fire as the flames flickered higher for a moment, casting a sinister look over his face in light and shadow. Nathan had fallen back weakly in his absence, unable to gather the strength to tend the fire or even take more of the thin broth. He took a breath but before he could say anything, William spoke.

"I'll help you," he stated quietly. "We'll wait a day or two until you're stronger... and then I'll open the thinny back to my world."

"Thank you," Nathan replied softly, any remaining energy failing him as he slumped back.

He closed his eyes and was asleep in moments, too exhausted to stay awake any longer, and if he felt the warmth of William wrapped around him for the few hours before dawn then his body chose to ignore it in favor of sleep. When he finally awoke hours later he felt no compulsion to move out of the loose embrace, letting William sleep on peacefully. He understood touch starvation all too well and though he ought to hate William with every fiber of his being, he felt an overwhelming sense of compassion for him, for the loneliness they had shared.

Neither of them mentioned the nights that followed, mirroring this one as they both took comfort in the touch of the other through the long, dark hours. It was so different to the mornings when he would awake with Audrey tucked up against him and yet the stirring inside him was the same, his body reacting to the closeness, to the warmth of William's breath against his skin and the weight of his limbs wrapped around him. He hated himself for the way he felt because William was a monster, a man who held humans in such contempt that he'd trouble a baby with a terrible curse just to get back what he wanted: Mara. Yet that little voice inside him reminded him that Mara had done far worse.

****

A day or two turned into a week but true to his word, the day came when William pulled out the chain hanging around his neck and held out the ring Nathan had given him all those months ago. Back on his feet, if a little unsteady, Nathan watched as William concentrated on the ring, his lips moving in some silent incantation as he focused inwards. Nathan felt the vibration in the air first of all, then a buzzing sound as the thinny began to open. Last time all he had seen was darkness beyond the portal but this time he thought he could see a meadow filled with wild flowers, with flashes of yellow, blue, and red among the tall grass. The thinny stabilized and William looked toward him, waiting stoically for a moment; a frown creased his handsome face when Nathan made no move toward it.

"It's where you want to go," he stated. "I promise."

"I trust you," Nathan replied softly. "Come with me, William."

"That wasn't the deal. And you'd probably have better luck persuading them to help you if I'm not there," he stressed.

"Come with me," Nathan asked again, holding William's blue eyes and offering his hand. "Please."

He couldn't absolve William of his guilt, or forgive him for what he had done to the people of Haven, but this past week had at least allowed him to see behind the arrogant mask and understand why William had followed Mara so blindly. Love made a fool of everyone and Nathan knew he had blood on his own hands for the lovesick actions he had taken in Haven in trying to stop Audrey from leaving that first time. He had destroyed the barn, bringing first William and then Croatoan into his world. It had been so easy to blame William for the events that followed - too easy - but Nathan knew he had pulled the trigger figuratively as well as literally, selfishly wanting to hold onto the first person who had touched him and made him feel alive after so many years of feeling numb, and all for nothing. All he had done was delay the inevitable.

So many might still be alive if he had not killed Agent Howard.

Duke might still be alive.

Nathan could see the indecision building in William's eyes along with the knowledge he would be alone again once Nathan stepped through to his home world, perhaps for the rest of his longer-than-human life. Nathan knew he'd won when William's shoulders sagged in defeat and his eyes dropped away. He nodded once and they walked through the thinny together, the tension back in William's body as it closed behind them, leaving them standing in the center of the wild meadow. Nathan started to walk forward only to realize they were trapped inside a transparent force field. Moments later he could see figures carrying weapons appearing at the edges of the meadow, heading towards them.

Another thinny opened right next to them, spilling out more grim-faced soldiers holding strange weapons. The force field surrounding him and William snapped out of existence and they were quickly restrained by other means.

"Welcome to my home world," William murmured wryly as his hands were bound and they were led through this new thinny.

On the other side of the thinny was a great hall with high ceilings. Walls of white marble shot through with veins of blue and green rose majestically around them with supporting columns elaborately carved with geometric shapes. The floor was black obsidian carved with the same diamond pattern found on Mara's ring, gleaming in the sunlight slanting through high-vaulted windows. Glazed in blue, green and gold, the sunlight cast colored patterns across the white marbled walls and columns.

"William. Your punishment was exile to the void. Why have you returned?"

"I asked him to come with me," Nathan spoke up, taking a step forward, only to gain a frown of disapproval from the older man approaching them. More of William's people were gathered behind him, faces stony with disapproval.

"Do not speak, human."

When he was walking among them in Haven, William had considered humans inferior to his own people. Perhaps it had been his way of justifying his cruel actions when he and Mara had used the aether on the people they found in Haven all those centuries ago, like scientists experimenting on white mice. Even Charlotte had regarded humans with indifference until she made an effort to see them as people who were simply not as advanced as her own, but sentient nonetheless. In contrast Mara's contempt for humans had been palpable, and far worse than William and Charlotte combined, though in those final months he learned so much more about her and the reasons for her cruelty. Not enough to forgive but sufficient to understand her motivation and her pain, driven by grief from losing her beloved father. Believing him dead, she had sought revenge on those she blamed for her loss, and Nathan wondered how different it might have been if she'd known he was still alive but in exile.

"His name is Nathan Wuornos," William replied forcefully. "And you should let him speak... father."

Nathan was as much surprised by William's refusal to see him treated like a dumb, nameless animal as he was to hear William address the only slightly older man as 'father'.

The older man raised both eyebrows in surprise too. For a moment Nathan wondered if this father-son relationship was why William feared he would hinder Nathan's attempt to save Audrey, but instead of anger the older man looked between them in something akin to awe, as if he had never expected his son to defend a human. The man bowed his head slightly.

"I will listen." He turned to Nathan. "Speak," he ordered.

Nathan cleared his throat, pulling together the words of a speech he had tried to memorize over these past months.

"You created the barn to save rather than punish Mara... but by its very nature she was never there, just a series of personalities imprinted over the top. The barn was destroyed, and when Mara's personality returned she had learned nothing from all those years of imprisonment, carrying on from where she left off." He paused to gauge the reaction to him telling them their rehabilitation program for Mara was an utter failure. "Mara succeeded in using the aether against her own kind-." Voices echoed around the marble hall in anger and fear, and Nathan waited a moment before continuing, raising his voice to gain their attention. "She was split into two people, Mara and her last personality, Audrey Parker. Charlotte had to choose which of them to save... and she chose Audrey."

The hall fell silent.

"Mara died believing her father was dead. She didn't know her father was Croatoan. He escaped from the void into my world," he continued over more voices, understanding their concern as it was Croatoan's experimentation with the aether that had made him a danger to his own people, forcing them to exile him. "And the only way we could save our world was to build a new barn, but it needed a power source. Audrey Parker."

Nathan could sense the relief when they realized Croatoan was safely imprisoned once more.

"We thank you for this information-."

"Audrey Parker isn't Mara. If your people are as advanced as you say you are then there has to be another way of imprisoning Croatoan without punishing Audrey."

The older man looked hard at William as if seeking confirmation for everything Nathan had said, and William sighed, voice tinged in grief as he answered the unspoken question.

"Mara is dead."

The older man nodded and after casting one more long look at William he began to walk back towards the others without another word. Nathan stepped forward in confusion.

"Wait! You can't just-."

He felt William's hand on his arm, drawing him back before the guards could move forward to subdue him forcefully. William shook his head sharply, blue eyes beseeching Nathan to trust him, and though he might have refused a week earlier, so much had changed between them since then. A thinny opened behind them and the guards forced them through it into a small, simple but comfortable room, though Nathan recognized a cell when he saw one. He was just surprised he and William had been put into the same cell. The strange bands holding their hands bound fell open and Nathan rubbed his wrists, noticing William doing the same. With the adrenaline leaving his body he felt exhausted and slumped down onto the single large bed that dominated the room and was easily big enough for two or three people, his head in his hands.

"You've done everything you could," William stated softly. "Now you'll just have to wait and see if it was enough. Until then you should rest."

Nathan nodded and lay back on the bed, closing his eyes, but despite the tiredness he couldn't fall asleep.

"He was your father," he murmured. "The man in the marble hall."

William sighed and lay back next to him. "Yeah. Jeremiah."

"He missed you."

The sharp bark of a laugh implied William didn't believe that for a second but Nathan had seen the bittersweet pleasure in the older man's eyes as he looked upon William covertly, as if trying to memorize William's face in those stolen glances. Weirdly, Nathan understood, having found himself glancing at William in a similar fashion over these past few days. The man who had caused havoc in Haven and who had treated him with such contempt during his first journey into the void seemed to have died with Mara, the brittle shell of arrogance cracking to reveal someone almost decent beneath. The opposite of Mara, whose shell - Audrey - had held the best parts of her.

"Love makes you do crazy things," Nathan said, recalling his own role in so many needless deaths.

"Love," William scoffed. "I was young and foolish. And Mara was so vibrant, so full of life, pushing back, rebelling against a system that predetermined a person's path in our world. A life mapped out from the moment we are born." He fell silent for a moment then continued almost in a whisper, and Nathan had to strain to hear his words. "I truly believed I loved her. I... _needed_ to believe I loved her because the alternative was unacceptable, that I'd thrown away the last five hundred years of my life and any possible future over nothing more than childish rebellion." His voice trembled and grew stronger with building anger. "I was wrong to come back here. There's no place for me here. Not anymore. They will never forgive me."

"I don't believe I'm about to say this but if there's nothing for you here or in the void then come back to Haven with me. Save lives instead of destroying them."

He felt rather than heard William turn his head to look at him.

"I thought all the aether was gone from Haven," William stated slyly.

"It has, but if you're as advanced as you say you are then you should be able to do some good for a change, without using aether," Nathan replied in annoyance, wishing he'd never made such a foolish offer after all.

William was silent for a long time. "I was supposed to be an administrator like my father, but I trained as a doctor in secret. I wanted to be a geneticist."

That made sense to Nathan and explained how William had used the aether to create the Troubles with Mara. A geneticist from an advanced race would have the necessary skills to manipulate DNA according to his - or her will.

"And Mara?"

"She was her father's daughter, following in his footsteps." He snorted in self-deprecation. "Her father was one of the greatest geneticists among our people, but his name wasn't Croatoan then. It was Jacob Cross."

That made sense too. Charlotte had mentioned Mara had been sick as a child and her father had saved her by infusing her with aether, and this very act had condemned him to exile. It was also why, unlike William when they were trapped in the cave, Mara - and therefore, Audrey - hadn't needed any on her hands before she could start to manipulate it for it was already inside her.

"You can choose to do good. Be a doctor who heals rather than makes people sick."

****

After two days a thinny opened in the cell and William's father stepped through.

"We have examined all the evidence and have come to an agreement. Nathan Wuornos, you will be returned to your world with Audrey Parker. Jacob Cross has been sent back into the void for his crimes, to remain in exile for the rest of his life. William..." His voice broke on the name but he drew in a breath. "William will be sent back into-."

"My world," Nathan interrupted. "Let him come back with me and Audrey to Haven."

Nathan could see a glimmer of hope in Jeremiah's eyes.

"The barn didn't work on Mara, and exile didn't work for your son. Give him the chance to make reparation for his crimes against my people."

Jeremiah turned to William. "If you go with him then Audrey Parker-."

"Nathan," William stated, and Nathan frowned because he didn't understand what they were discussing.

"Unusual request... but if Nathan Wuornos is willing, fitting."

"Willing to what?"

Jeremiah continued looking at William as he answered.

"To be his watcher. His guardian for the rest of his exile, which is for life." Jeremiah turned to Nathan. "His life."

"I don't think he understands, _dad_." William turned to Nathan. "You're not going to die like your friend Vince, but you're going to wish you were. If you agree to this then you can forget a happy ever after with Audrey. You'll be bound to me for as long as I live, and that could be for a few _thousand_ years," he stressed.

Nathan turned to Jeremiah. "And will he be bound to me the same way?"

William's eyes had widened slightly, and it was obvious he hadn't expected Nathan to even consider those terms; his father nodded.

Nathan tensed for a moment before nodding in acceptance, knowing it wasn't that far different to the deal Vince had made in replacing Agent Howard. Not so long ago he would have refused to sacrifice his life to be a controller for William but if the only other option was for Audrey to be bound to William for the rest of her life then he could do this. After all, he refused to set her free from one prison only to lock her into another. She deserved to live her life whereas he and William still needed to atone for the blood on their hands; it seemed fitting somehow. 

Jeremiah smiled softly. "William?"

He waited patiently as William took it all in. Nathan knew it was as much Hobson's Choice as a dilemma; a take it or leave it situation where William could choose either a lifetime bound to Nathan, or he could go back into exile in the void with Jacob Cross - Croatoan. William had survived five hundred years in the void with Croatoan so Nathan knew he might be able to survive another five hundred, or even a thousand. He might even be able to reach Jacob Cross and find some measure of friendship and companionship with Mara's father, though that was doubtful. Nathan had made his decision and William needed to be free to make his choice in turn.

"I can live with that," William replied softly before turning to his father, who reached out and laid a hand on his shoulder.

No more words passed between them before Jeremiah stepped back through the thinny, his touch lingering on William until the last moment. The thinny closed but another opened in its place and William squared his shoulder before walking through. As Nathan crossed the threshold he felt a burning sensation through his body that dulled immediately, leaving a lingering sensation that he knew was his lifetime connection to William. He was back on Haven Lookout and Audrey was standing just a few feet away, looking a little bewildered. 

Nathan laughed happily as he stepped forward and hugged her, kissing her deeply. She was back in his arms again and if not for the man glowering at his back, life would have been perfect.

Despite initial fears and resentments, the town gradually accepted William's presence and at first Nathan didn't understand why William believed he would wish himself dead after a time. He and Audrey were together and they were so happy. Their two children played at their feet, filling their home with laughter.

It was a small thing, barely noticeable at first. A new wrinkle in her otherwise flawless skin that he put down to laughter lines, and then she found a gray hair, and another and Nathan knew her return to Haven had come at the cost of her normal life span. They had allowed her to be free but given her a human life, and that would have been acceptable had Nathan's life not been bound to William. His children grew into adults and his beautiful Audrey grew older and more frail, her honey-blond hair turning gray and then white, her eyesight dimming and her smooth skin wrinkling and becoming mottled with liver spots. Yet she was still beautiful to Nathan.

William stood some distance away as he buried Audrey on Haven Lookout, having gained permission from the Town. A small memorial was placed there in her honor.

****

In the first few decades following Audrey's death Nathan resented the connection that bonded his life to William's, wishing he could have died and been buried with her. Gradually the resentment faded as the world moved on and William became his only constant, so it seemed inevitable that eventually his thoughts returned to those almost forgotten days in the void. He remembered the way William had felt pressed up against him, the way William had nuzzled the back of his neck when he thought he was asleep, pressing small kisses against the nape, and the way his hands had drifted over his body only to tense when Nathan moved even a fraction.

Once the idea was inside his head he couldn't shake it, feeling it grow daily.

The sensation of butterflies in his stomach told him this was a daunting and yet exciting prospect, one that his heart had already decided upon unknowingly. It made sense of all the irrational feelings he'd felt for William since their first meeting, even before their first touch. Without any sensations in his body he hadn't recognized his attraction to either sex. He'd latched onto Audrey from her first touch and made assumptions about himself based on that encounter, adamantly refusing to consider why his heart raced whenever he felt William's touch.

Nathan knew he wanted this; he knew he could willingly share himself with William and be bound to him for the rest of their lives in all ways, knowing it would be as much a pleasure as a penance, but William had been with Mara. William had chosen her over all others, even if he'd freely admitted he had simply wanted to believe it was love when it might have been other emotions masquerading as love. Yet those nights in the void with William wrapped around him made him want to believe otherwise. The press of his body and those light kisses were not the actions of someone adverse to sharing intimacy with someone of his own gender.

In the past Nathan might have remained silent, waiting for William to say something but he knew William was the master of avoidance, with walls built up over hundreds of years, and perhaps that was why his people had sent William into exile with the rest of the mindless monsters like Croatoan. These long years had revealed the man behind those walls; a man who could be gentle and loving, who could be filled with passion for some cause, and yet still be the most annoying person in the world on occasion... and Nathan had grown to love him.

He waited until they were alone in the simple house they were renting in the middle of Paris, listening as William talked about his day animatedly. Eventually William noticed his silence.

"What?"

"Back on your world I willingly promised to be bound to you for as long as you live... and I wanted you to know I mean that in all ways." He cleared his throat, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks as he broached the subject of intimacy while holding William's wide-blue eyes. "Including sex." He raced on, "It's my choice... and I'm happy with it, but if that's not what you want then-."

The kiss almost took him by surprise, soft and gentle at first before becoming more demanding, more insistent, more... William. Nathan kissed him back just as ferociously, pulling at clothing until he could feel William's smooth skin beneath his fingertips. He groaned in pleasure when they'd lost most of their clothes, feeling the warmth of skin against skin as they tumbled onto the bed, frantically kicking off the remaining items as they dragged each other close. Nathan felt the heat of William's hand wrap around both of their erections, momentarily lost as the pleasure swept through him, tingling from every nerve ending. He thrust into the tight grip, hearing the hitch in William's breath as the pleasure built between them, thrumming through the connection that had seemed so slight until this moment. Now it was singing between them, drawing them higher until Nathan felt he was standing on a precipice and one last soft cry from William was enough to send him flying over the edge, suspended for one moment in time in pure ecstasy. When he came back to himself William was sprawled beside him, sated and spent, smiling lips swollen from bruising kisses, and he'd never looked more beautiful to Nathan.

****

**Epilogue:**

The world changed constantly over the next five hundred years, and though the memories of Haven's Troubles had turned to myth and legend Nathan and William had managed to keep their longevity a secret. They moved from place to place over the centuries, building new lives and then moving on when people began to question their noticeable lack of aging. They explored the world, learning new skills and helping those in need when they could.

The sex was still amazing. After so many years they knew how to pleasure each other; how to strengthen their connection as fumbling touches turned to gentle caresses and hard strokes; how to hold each other on the razor edge of ecstasy where time held no meaning until they fell into sweet, mind-blowing oblivion, held safe in each others arms.

Nathan ensured they returned to Haven every once in a while, sitting on Haven's Lookout side-by-side beside the slowly decaying monument as they recalled their younger selves and the mistakes they had made. On this occasion Nathan looked across at the man he had come to love beyond life itself and he reached out to capture a single lock at his temple, seeing the first streak of silver in the blond hair.

"You have some gray too," William murmured, smiling as he reached out to touch Nathan's hair in turn.

In the small town below they watched as a colonial ship took off, rising fast as it started the first leg of its journey to one of the closer colonies on either Mars or the Moon, maybe even as far as Europa. Perhaps one day he and William might go to one of the main spaceports and book a passage to the stars, but that was a decision for another day, another year, perhaps another century.

END  
 

**Author's Note:**

> Audrey dies of old age after a long, happy life.


End file.
